film fandom tv and personal blog. expect random and unannounced hiatuses, sometimes gifs, sometimes emotions. and i like ryan gosling. and tea.
I’m not tumblr famous or anything. I don’t get 1k notes on every gif set, I don’t get messages all the time, I don’t have thousands of followers. But since I lost my job a few months ago, tumblr has been like the home I wish I had in real life. I know I passed it off as “Oh whatever I’m better off” after getting fired, but really deep down it really hurt. I felt lonely. I felt ashamed. I felt like a useless failure. So in my monumental amount of spare time a few months ago, I started to blog more. Started to talk to people and people started to talk to me. Started actually making gifs and edits again. You all made me feel liked and suddenly I didn’t feel so lonely.
When you like or reblog my edits or gifs, it doesn’t matter to me that a set has only ten notes or whatever … because it might seem like a small number, but really it meant that ten people liked it. Ten people appreciated something I made, even liked it. That’s more than I can say than has ever happened to me in real life.
I don’t feel like a useless failure anymore. So even if you’ve never talked to me, never liked or reblogged anything: seeing that you have stuck around (for whatever reason) really keeps me going. It’s the season of giving and you all have given me happiness, purpose, and drive.
So thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, and merry Christmas to you.